I hesitated to make a big deal of it- but really, I just had to document it.
I have not taken any of the hair bows out of the bathroom. I could not. Something about giving up the little girl things- not wanting to let go of that time.
Anyway- she has not worn one for a long time. Like years. Would turn away at the suggestion.
But 2 weeks ago while looking for something in the drawer, I pulled out a purple bow and just asked, "Do you want to wear this today?" Her reply? "Sure."
I tried to not act excited for fear she would change her mind. With shaky hands I put it in her ponytail thinking, "Please don't change your mind, please don't change your mind."
I could feel time just kind of stop for a moment. When mostly lately it feels like it is slipping through my fingers. Silly, but it put a lump in my throat. These bows that we have had forever. Since she was 2 and 3 years of age. She has worn them many times before. But not for a long time. Around 9 she just kind of became too old for bows. Her words. Not mine.
I was never a bow or ribbon girl. And when I had my girl, my first child, I was not so much a bow or ribbon mom. But she was. From the moment she could twirl she wanted skirts and bows ... always.
So to revisit those days, her "little girl" bows, on such a beautiful growing-into-a-young-woman head it made me stop and hold the moment; not let it slip through my fingers.
I always have the camera with me. And I snapped a photo in the morning as we were loading into the car before school.
And then held my breath as she came out of school waiting to see if she still had it in.
Click went the camera.
She still did.
This moment may be all that it was. Just a moment. One day - to remind me of her little girl days and to recognize the passage of time.